One Month Old and She Already Has A Court Date...

Two days after we arrived home from the hospital, I received a juror summons in the mail.  Seriously...of all the times to be called, why did it have to be now?  Any other time I would have enjoyed having some paid days off work to sit in court and perform my "civic duty."  Fortunately, there was a phone number on the summons you could call to be pre-excused if you felt sitting on the jury panel would present an "excessive hardship."  Well surely being on maternity leave and nursing a newborn presented an excessive hardship (right?), so I tried to call the number and get released.  Well I called, and I left a message, and I called, and I left more messages.  I tried the judicial clerk, the court reporter, the law intern, and the bailiff, which were all the options on the answering machine.  Would you like for me to recite their message because I totally can.  But no answer, no return phone calls.  I called the main number listed for the Bessemer Courthouse, which happened to be the Revenue Department, and we all know that Revenue workers are renowned for their helpfulness and understanding.  No surprise, they were no help.  When I finally thought to call the Circuit Clerk's office to see if I could get someone on phone, the message on the machine (again, for heavens sake!) was "We are closed on Friday.  Please try again on Monday."  Well Monday was the summons date, so that got me nowhere.  Guess I would just have to show up...

Over the weekend, I had dreams of not being released, of the judge telling me I could just nurse in the bathroom stall, of having to stand up during the middle of a trial and say, "Excuse me, I need to change a dirty diaper.  Can we reconvene in five minutes?"

Monday morning arrived, and we got up earlier than usual to get dressed for court.  I made sure to put Amelia in the cutest outfit she had because if I couldn't sway them with my reasoning, maybe she could sway them with her sweetness.  When we got to Bessemer, I realized the juror parking lot was almost six blocks from the Justice Center.  Since there was no way I was going to carry a car seat that far, I unpacked the stroller, and we literally rolled up into the courtroom.  We checked in and sat down and crossed our fingers that this process wouldn't last long.  Fortunately, baby girl was on her best behavior.  She was wide awake and content to just look around and admire her new surroundings.  Finally, after roll call and eligibility checks including citizenship, residency, and mental/physical competency, Judge Hobdy said, "If you have any other reason why you feel you shouldn't serve, please line up at the front."  That was our cue.  We were sitting at the back of the room and as we rolled to the front, I caught snippets of people saying, "Surely having a newborn will be excused" and "Look, she has a baby.  I hope they let her go."  The people were on our side; hopefully, Judge Hobdy would be too.  When it was our turn to talk to him, I didn't even have to really explain other than, "I'm on maternity leave and nursing.  See, I brought proof"  To his credit, he commented on how cute she was and asked her age and her name, which I thought was very nice of him.  He then said we could sit down while he talked to other people in the Please Excuse Me Line, and commented to the guy who walked up behind me, "I bet you don't have a reason as good as that one." 

A few minutes later, he called our name along with some others, and we were excused!  Obviously.  Although, how funny would it have been to have halted court proceedings so I could go nurse.  "Excuse me your honor.  Can I please sit in your chambers and feed my child?"  On the way out, I chatted with an older man who was also excused.  He was dressed like a total kook and was carrying around a Crown Royal bag.  He told me that he was excused because he told the judge, "Several years ago, I was diagnosed with a seizure disorder.  While I haven't had an episode in a while, I could have a small seizure and temporarily lose my train of thought."  Yeah...I'm sure Judge Hobdy didn't even have to think hard on that one.  Clearly, the two easiest ways to get released from jury duty include showing up with a newborn and claiming that you could "lose your train of thought."  I'll keep that in mind for future summons...

So today was (hopefully) Amelia's first and last court appearance until she is either called to serve as a juror or is sitting behind the bench.  Let's all keep our fingers crossed...